This might be the most on model picture ot Talinka I've drawn yet, I'm quite satisfied, but I digress. Last year I gave you all a nice cup of peppermint hot chocolate, this year's gift is a bit more out of the ordinary, but worth any amount of trouble you have to go to to make one. So, Happy Holidays everyone, whatever you may celebrate. Sorry, but yes, you do have to assemble your own Christmas present from me, lame I know, but hey, it's better than nothing.
This years holiday treat from me to you is MonteCristo Sandwiches
(This is instructions for one sandwich, which will feed one male-over-twelve or two females
You will Need:
2 pieces 'squishy' bread. I use HomeMaid brand and it works fantastically. If pressed Wonder or another brand can by used but it must be SQUISHABLE.
Mayo and Mustard (Or miracle whip if you prefer)
Ham (The lunchmeat variety or sliced -very- thin)
Blackberry jam (or raspberry...and if you don't have either of those strawberry will work in a pinch)
Butter OR Pancake batter and cooking oil(I use Krusteaz cos I'm lazy like that)
The order you assemble the sandwich in is important or it won't stick very well, so pay attenchun. Put mayonaise on one piece of bread and mustard on the other, don't overdo it, a little should suffice. Cover one of your bread pieces with swiss cheese EVENLY, keeping in mind it will be sliced diagonally and any small pieces will fall out. Place a piece of ham on top ofthe swiss cheese. Cover the ham with cheddar cheese in a similar fashion to how you did the swiss. Place the second piece of bread on top (mustard/may side down of course). If you're going all out, Continue here, if you really don't want too much of a mess and are wililng to settle for a sandwish one step down from the master variety, skip to the next paragraph (the Easy Way) for alternative cooking methods. Squish it. Squish it again. Eat the top layer of crust. Squish it again. You should now have a very flat looking sandwich. Cut it in half diagonally and secure it with two toothpicks on each triangle. Make sure it's still squished. Now it's time to cook it.
The Easy Way
If you are here because you are lazy and don't want to go through the trouble of making pancake batter and deep frying this, you should have an unsquished sandwich in front of you. Butter both sides of it liberally (the outsides) and cook it (medium heat or lower so it doesn't burn) in a frying pan like a grilled cheese sandwich. Go to the serving
The Fun Way
If you have a SQUISHED sandwich in front of you you're in for a real treat. I hope you have your pancake batter ready, if you don't, no worries, your sandwich is patient. It will wait on the counter obediently for you until it's prepared. Now you have pancake batter? Good. Dip your sandwich in it, cover it in the batter (this is why you need the toothpicks) Time to deep fry.
To deep fry:
Heat some vegetable/canola oil in a pot big enough for your sandwich over MEDIUM heat. It shouldn't ever need to get to a full out boil, it's dangerous and it scares the crap out of me. Don't set your house on fire trying to make my Christmas present to you, that wouldn't be cool. To see when your oil is just right, drop a -small- blob of pancake batter into it: if nothing happens it's not ready. It should sizzle immidiatly and cook itself within a few moments, if it does this, put your battered sandwich in -carefully- and let it fry until it's a nice golden brown (You'll need tongs to turn it over half way through) When it's done, stick it on a napkin covered plate while you turn the oil off and dig out some blackberry (or raspberry) jam and some powdered sugar. DO IT. Trust me, it's good.
Don't skip the jam. I know it sounds gross, you'll like it I promise. Put a big plop of jam on the plate next to your pretty golden sandwich. Sprinkle the sandwich with powdered sugar. Dip the sandwich in the jam as you eat it, it's the weirdest combination of ingredients I've ever tried, but it's delicious.
Last years: [link]
Enjoy, and Happy holidays everyone!